One minute I’m driving along North Caswell, behind this big red truck with testicles hanging off their tow hook, thinking to myself, “How big of an asshole do you have to be to give your truck balls?” Happy when they decide to turn onto 5th.
I slow a little, to let them turn, I look up and there’s a SUV turning into my lane, and in about 10 seconds, if I don’t stop, we’re going to be occupying the exact same space.
My thoughts go something like this for the next 10 or so minutes:
Shit! Brake dammit!
Oh, look, I’m in the middle of the intersection.
Wow, look at all those people running, it’s like in a movie.
Move the bike. Now. Out of the intersection. Now. You’re in the middle of the intersection. That is bad.
No, dude, that’s the kick-start. Use the center stand.
The woman stopped. She’s apologizing. She looks shaken. She needs a hug. Wait, that would be awkward.
Shit, is it leaking gas? Check, make sure no pipes are leaking. Okay, whew.
Now, wash your hands. The nice man says they have a bathroom, wash your hands.
*laughter* This is what I get for making a joke about having an accident on twitter.
Look, they sent the ambulance. And all the cops. and a fire truck. damn
Omg, I could have died.
It was a very weird thing. And I still only remember in flashes.
Flashes which are now burned into my mind because they’ve been playing in almost constant repeat since.
I’ve managed to push them to the back of my head, where they simply can play over and over without my constant attention. But it’s there.
I still feel shaken. At moments it hits me, hard, that holy shit, I came six inches/two seconds from dying. Which makes me want to find someone with warm, broad shoulders and curl my head up on their shoulder and cry a little.
Instead, I sit and take deep breathes and wait it out.
I don’t have any brilliant insights. No I should have, could have, would have’s. I am simply resting, healing and patiently waiting for reality to return. For now, I’m just shaken.
And happy. I mean, I am alive – not smeared across the intersection of 5th & Caswell. For that, if nothing else, I am deeply grateful.