Faced fears

Almost 100 days ago I accepted the 100 Things I Fear Challenge. A while ago I stopped writing about it. It became deeply personal, and my personal life if not free range for the internet, so I kept it close to my heart.

It’s been an interesting ride and the things I’ve learned have been fascinating:

  • So many of our limitations are in our heads. We imagine, believe, think or were told we can’t/shouldn’t/won’t be able to do something or the other. And we listened.
  • Acceptance is the defeater of fear. Once I realized some of my limitations were real, acknowledged which ones I was just making up or letting others place on me, I was able to figure out how to move forward. Sometimes, I didn’t need to move, I just needed to sit with how I felt.
  • Fear moves us. Either towards or away from something, but it moves us. We get to choose in which direction we move. I’ve chosen to let my fear of *not* having the life I want move me away from the fears of the things I think I’ll fail at.
  • Move your feet, lose your seat. Growing up in WV I heard this phrase a lot. There were a half a dozen of us kids in the family, and never enough seats. If you wanted to keep yours, you had to hold on to it. If you wanted a seat, you had to be ready to hop to it when someone else got out of one. Related, “move it or lose it.” You have to keep your eyes open, look for opportunities & take them.
  • The worst thing they can do is say “no”. Well, or mock you mercilessly. Which, so far hasn’t happened. Just ask if you want something. No one’s going to just magically hand it to you.
  • I am responsible for my own fears. No one else, which means I have to decide to face them. I can, however, ask for help. Sometimes we just need someone to hold us accountable.

I’ve done some crazy things in the last three months. I am glad of them. I learned a lot about fears – which to follow and which to avoid and when to listen. I loosened up my heart strings, opened up my life and faced at least one fear a day.

I don’t plan to change that – even when the 100 days are up.